Monday, July 18, 2011

Truisms by Women

~Inside every older lady is a younger lady -- wondering, "What the hell happened"?~
~Cora Harvey Armstrong~
~Inside me lives a skinny woman crying to get out. But I can usually shut her up with cookies.~
[Anonymous. However, I think I've said this a million times!]
~ The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy. ~
~Helen Hayes (at 73)~

~I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as stray eyebrows. ~
~Janette Barber~
~Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse. ~
~Lily Tomlin~
~A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a car.~
~Carrie Snow~
 ~Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your girlfriends.~
~Laurie Kuslansky~
~My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being, hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint. ~
~Erma Bombeck~
~ Old age ain't no place for sissies. ~
~Bette Davis~
 ~A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't. ~
~Rhonda Hansome ~
~The phrase "working mother" is redundant. ~
~Jane Sellman~
~Every time I close the door on reality, it comes in through the windows.~
~Jennifer Unlimited~
~Whatever women must do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult. ~
~Charlotte Whitton~
  ~Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.~
~Caryn Leschen~
~I try to take one day at a time -- but sometimes several days attack me at once.~
~Jennifer Unlimited~
~If you can't be a good example -- then you'll just have to be a horrible warning. ~
~Catherine~
~When I was young, I was put in a school for retarded kids for two years before they realized I actually had a hearing loss. And they called ME slow! ~
~Kathy Buckley~
~I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb -- and I'm also not blonde. ~
~Dolly Parton~
~ If high heels were so wonderful, men would be wearing them. ~
~Sue Grafton ~
~I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on. ~
~Roseanne Barr~
~When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.~
~Elayne Boosler~
~Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. ~
~Maryon Pearson~
~In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man. If you want anything done, ask a woman.~
~Margaret Thatcher~
~I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. ~
~Gloria Steinem~
~I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house. ~
~Zsa Zsa Gabor~
~Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.~
~Eleanor Roosevelt~
~Ask a man to do a task - he'll hire six men, call a conference, call for pizza, go to Home Depot for tools and equipment, then take a week to complete the "project".
Ask a woman to do the same task and she'll have the drain unclogged in half an hour.~
~Sheri Slaughter~

2 comments:

Nancy said...

Yes, yes, yes!

Travelin'Oma said...

This is a fabulous list of quotations. Women are cool.